


don't want to say bye

by Sneakyfox55



Series: Never Forget [6]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Dream Sequences, F/M, Inspired by Music, Sans (Undertale) Needs a Hug, Self-Harm, Why Did I Write This?, all this fic is is pain, and his wife already, cause ya'll know i love my dream sequences, consider that a warning, even by my standards this is too much Sans suffering lmbo--, please give this guy therapy, we stan therapist Reader up in here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-12 00:48:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28626753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sneakyfox55/pseuds/Sneakyfox55
Summary: Sans had a dream one night, the week you’d gone missing.
Relationships: Sans (Undertale)/Reader
Series: Never Forget [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1879786
Comments: 13
Kudos: 29





	don't want to say bye

**Author's Note:**

> if you guys want to know what kind of fics i start writing at 2 in the morning,
> 
> it's stuff like this, apparently
> 
> (song that inspired this is [this one](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vy1JwiXHwI4), by the way: and totally recommend AJR as a whole, they're awesome)

Sans had a dream one night, the week you’d gone missing.

He was in the field near the house again, looking out at the night sky—it was a clear night, the clearest he’d ever seen, and so, so bright.

It wasn’t too cold or hot either. It was warm.

If he’d had his wish, this is the place he wanted to be, nowhere else—if he couldn’t be by your side, that is. And right now he couldn’t be. He knew that.

But, at the same time, he didn’t want to settle for second best.

This place just made him think of you, even more so, if that was possible.

He didn’t want to be here anymore.

He wanted to be where you were.

Everyone just kept telling him to hold out. To not give up, to not lose hope—you’d only been missing for almost a week, you could still be found.

You were still alive—you were still okay, he would still be okay.

...

But what if you weren’t?

What if you weren’t okay, and he wouldn’t be?

What if this pain lasted, what if he couldn’t heal?

_What if._

Sometimes, nothing else mattered to him; sometimes he’d get so caught up, desperately hoping he could join you in the stars.

What if he _did_ join you?

He’d dream about that too, on occasion.

Maybe that’s where he was now, in the field, and you were here somewhere.

Maybe, if he called for you...

“(Y/N)!”

His voice reverberated back to him, cracked and weak.

He tried again.

And again.

His voice kept returning, desperate, broken. He felt broken.

He felt lost.

He...

He felt like he wanted to die.

This felt too real.

If you weren’t here, where was he?

Why couldn’t he be with you?

Why had you been taken away from him?

Why, why, _why_?

He crumbled to the ground, burying his face into the spiky grass. It hurt—it got into his sockets, and burned his wet cheekbones, but it didn’t hurt any worse than anything else could.

And he wanted to feel the pain, at this point.

He kept wheezing out sob after sob, figuring this was the peak-level of pathetic he could hit. Even if it was a dream, the pain seemed real, particularly when his phalanges started digging into his forearms out of habit—he expended magic from them, burning into the bone like glorified acid. Pretty acid. Cyan, pearly acid.

It was beautiful. It made him cry harder.

But, in his wailing,

the stars took notice.

They came down from the heavens and surrounded him, hovering like souls. He didn’t notice, for his own soul only wept for you, and nothing else. His bones ached as he lay still, ignoring the lights around him. The magic had drained from him, everything in him fleeing.

But a moment later, something warm, and soft, brushed his skull.

It brought him enough comfort to stir, his eye-lights blinking back to life, just a bit. The warm and soft something supported him, until he could sit up.

He was tired, and broken—still, you smiled at him.

Again, you pressed the palm of your hand to his cheek, thumb brushing away his tears.

_Hi,_ was all you said to him, just a wisp of the wind, almost—but, your voice was filled with the same warmth and tenderness, just as he remembered.

Sans responded by pressing his forehead into your shoulder, arms winding around you, and clutching you close.

“please don’t leave me. please.”

_I won’t,_ you assured him gently, hugging him back. _Not right now._

“i’m sorry—i’m sorry,” he carried on, like he hadn’t even heard you. “i didn’t mean to make you leave, i didn’t—i love you, please, please come back.”

_I didn’t leave because of you._ Your voice was a whisper, said against the top of his skull as you kissed him.

It was a lie. It had to be, somehow, it...

“i miss you,” he choked out, nuzzling his tear-streaked face against your shirt. “i’ll... i-i’ll do better, i promise, i—”

_Don’t make promises you can’t keep._

He fell silent, because he knew you had a point.

Maybe... Maybe it was best you did leave him.

Maybe...

You leaned back, gazing at him, gently rubbing his arm, back and forth. Your touch soothed him, and healed the holes his magic had burned into him. _You’ll be alright,_ you assured him, _you have to be. Okay?_

Sans could do nothing else but nod shakily.

For you, he would be.

For you, he’d do anything.

You smiled.

_Good._ A pause. The howling of the wind replaced your words for a moment. _...Hey._

He perked up slightly, looking at you as if you were about to give him the entire galaxy.

_Tell me about your day,_ was your soft direction, _like you used to. You’ll feel better._

He didn’t think so. Not really. But he had you, just for now; so he did tell you.

He told you everything—about Papyrus recently joining the Ebott Police force, looking to help Undyne and the sergeant. About Asgore being arrested. About Alphys trying to look into other disappearances similar to yours. About Toriel doing the best she could in keeping peace with the humans.

About Frisk, still trying to give him Hope.

Most of all, he told you about himself. Only because you insisted on it. He told you he was lost without you, that he _wanted_ to keep living, for you and everyone, but it was so _hard_.

And, for the life of him, he couldn’t understand how things ended up like this. How he’d come so far only for life to slap him in the face yet again, in addition to kicking him to the ground.

You didn’t have a true answer for it—you couldn’t have. ~~You were just a figment of his imagination, after all.~~

_Sometimes life just... Happens,_ you settled for vaguely, but he knew you were trying. _There’s not a lot you can do about it._

“but why me?”

To that, you didn’t have an answer, either.

“what did i do?” Sans went on hoarsely. “why di—why _did_ you leave, i thought... i-i thought i was finally doing something _right_.”

_Maybe you were._

“then w...” He couldn’t finish, gripping his arms again, magic leaking out from his phalanges again. You unlatched them with your own fingers, holding his hands in yours.

_I don’t know,_ you admitted. _I... Really don’t know, sweetheart._

You leaned forward, and kissed him right between his eyesockets. You pulled away but the feeling of your lips against his skull lingered for longer, as though you’d given him magic of your own.

_But I know I love you. No matter what._

Sans’s eye-lights shook and dimmed, until his eyes were nothing but gaping holes in his face. He collapsed into you again with his hands pressing to the small of your back, resting his head against your chest, desperate to hold on.

“i love you,” he sobbed, so, so devastated, so hysterical. “i love you too, i love you...”

You held him tight, until the sun rose over the horizon, and you returned to fade into the stars—your touch just a memory, your voice just a whisper on the breeze once more.

He woke up.


End file.
